Female factor

Today morning while having breakfast I happen to read a news in newspaper which made me feel down for the day. Some people in northern states of India kill girl babies as soon as they are born by suffocating them by pillows or by putting jiggery balls in the mouth of the girl babies so that they choke and they die. It was heartening to come to know about such news in the morning and I was heavy hearted when I was walking to my office. My heart really poured for those kids, what was wrong with those new babies for not to live a life in this world.

Wikipedia lists a recent report by the United Nations Children's Fund (UNICEF) up to 50 million girls and women are missing in India's population as a result of systematic sex discrimination. The issue of female infanticide is  a big problem in India than in any other country. In rest of the world, sex of the child is disclosed before the delivery itself. In India I wonder that kind of culture can come into place in the near future given the obsession the society has for baby boys. Not only men, but even women (both educated and illiterate) in India want to have baby boys.  The worst situation is when these abortions are carried out well beyond the safe period of 12 weeks endangering the women’s life.

I saw some reports on this problem in the internet and one such analysis can be found at : http://www.sascv.org/ijcjs/snehlata.pdf

In rural India the female infanticide is very high and I would completely blame the society for this social problem. The system in the society is so tightly coupled for rules for women, some people cannot afford to lead a life in such a system and they take such extreme steps.

Few points I have listed which are the fueling factors as per my understanding starting from 1 to  5 with 1 being the highest.

1.      Girls have to go to someone else’s house after bringing them up, educating them and loving them and carry their names. J

2.      Girls cannot take care of their parents in their old age and perform rituals of after death.

3.      The expenses of marriage is high and in many states and castes the problem of dowry is well prevailing and the cost of dowry will be usually the complete earnings of life of her parents (Sometimes even selling off their properties).

4.      Girls do not carry forward the legacy of their families and the family names.

5.      Girls are having problems driven by nature for the cause of reproduction which they have to go through throughout their lives and bear the pains of labors.

There could be many other valid and serious reasons still. But what I could derive from the news and the way the system in society works.

I do not want to debate much on the issues of family names, legacy, taking care of parents and all that. Nobody remembers my name after my 2^nd generation. At most my grandchildren may remember my name because I do not remember my great grand parents’ names!. Finally what is in a name? And why one has to change their birth names and why cannot men also change when society asks women to change their names? It’s out of love and affection you want your spouse’s name with yours and not by force.

Taking care of parents should be left to girls/boys conscience. It’s their duty and love which should drive them to do that. No excuses based on gender.
Everyone knows that dowry system is also a big social issue and no rational thinking person agrees with such a system.

When a man wants a woman for giving birth to him and a girl to get married, at-least two women are needed there itself. But if he does not want a daughter then he is denying two people in another man’s life. A woman is needed as mother and wife, why not as a daughter?  Statistics show that there are 914 women for every 1000 men in India. A big gap in the gender count.

I am not a revolutionist to bring a change in society or an influential person to change the system. But I definitely want some of my blog readers to give thoughts on this issue and spread awareness.

Signing off for now,

Ranjani